Therapy for Teens
Life is hard and full of questions for teens.
The time between adolescence and young adulthood consists of a billion impossible questions.
“Why do I have to go to school every day? I will never need to use the information they are teaching me, so why do the homework?”
“What do I have to do for people to like me? I want to fit in somewhere; what if no one likes me? What am I even doing?”
“How do I choose a college; I don’t even know what I want to do for the rest of my life? This new job is daunting; what if I don’t know something?”
Adolescence can be an incredibly challenging time.
Adolescence is when you are old enough to want freedom but too young to have enough of it. Or you want so badly to be somebody, but at the same time have no idea who you are.
The pressure that society puts on adolescents to excel at everything they do and the pressure to live a certain way is very prominent in the lives of adolescents and young adults.
Far too often, young people recognize they have something important to say, but no one will listen.
Experiencing things for the first time can be intense.
Dear Diary,
I tried to tell my parents why I hated going to school. They never get it. All they care about is if my grades are good and if I am on the right track for college. I don’t even know if I want to go to college.
Today at school, it felt like everyone was talking about me behind my back. Sometimes, I even wonder if my friends actually like me.
I felt so overwhelmed; my partner and I broke up. I might never love anyone ever again. My mom told me, “It’s alright, you will date plenty of
other people in your life, you are young,” but it doesn’t feel all right. I am sad all the time. It is hard to want to do anything when everything feels so hard and pointless.
Everyone treats me like I don’t know anything, so I might as well act like I don’t know anything.
– What’s the Point?
Intense feelings, good or bad, take a lot of energy out of us. In addition to those intense feelings, teens have eight hours of school, plus homework, plus sports or other after-school activities. By the time they get through all of this, there is hardly anything left for their hobbies, the things they like to do, or are really interested in doing.
The weight of a tough time can be heavy.
Dear Diary,
My parents took my game away again. Why don’t they understand that I connect with my friends and relax with these games? The game is all I have to look forward to on many days.
I have to do all of these things they tell me to, just because they say so, but they take away the thing that I want to do. It doesn’t make me want to do what they are asking me.
It feels like what I want and what I think doesn’t matter at all.
– Will I Always Be Misunderstood?
Sharing those things that are hard with others is scary. We never get to know how someone will react to what we share with them, and we fear they will see us differently or judge us. It is even more challenging to be vulnerable if it feels like no one ever listens to what we have to say.
The transition from childhood to adolescence to adulthood is crucial.
Dear Diary,
Getting all of my work done is such a challenge. My new boss tries to encourage me, but I can tell they are frustrated with me. I don’t understand. I should be able to do this with no problem. But no matter how hard I try, I am not doing it all fast enough.
Every time I try to tell someone, they just tell me what to do to fix the problem; they never even bother to ask if I tried those things. I have
tried so many things, and I think about it all the time. I think about it so much that I can’t fall asleep at night because I replay those scenarios in my head a million times trying to figure out what little things I could change for different outcomes.
Everyone expects me to do well, but I feel like I am failing. Will the rest of my life be like this?
– What Do I Do?
This transition is the start of the rest of our lives. It is supposed to be all these contradicting things, which is so confusing and frustrating.
When life is too chaotic or when someone does not get the help they need during this time, it can prevent them from developing the skills and coping mechanisms crucial to managing the rest of their lives. Without those skills, it will make future life challenges even more difficult.
We develop many of our core beliefs about ourselves and our place in the world during adolescence and young adulthood. For an extended period of time, If adolescents feel misunderstood, unimportant, isolated – like everyone is against them – they are incapable of greatness, and nothing they ever do is good enough. Those feelings will follow them into adulthood.
Finding someone who cares makes life less complicated.
Dear Diary,
I saw my therapist today. I thought talking to them would be like talking to my parents. It was different. My therapist just listened to me. They asked me what I thought and really made it clear they wanted to see it from my point of view.
It felt like they were actually on my side. I am interested to see how this goes.
– Hopeful
Someone does care.
If you and your teen are struggling, reach out today. We help you figure out ways to improve your situation and how your teen is feeling.
Let us help you work with your teen to make sure they receive the most out of their life.
Call us today to schedule your teen’s virtual appointment.